Chaos has begun again

So my birthday was the 3rd of the month yeah I'm 22. I got sick the day after after being sick the week before, fun times, fun times, you wish you were me. Life is still crazy as we ended up back in Arkansas a week after my birthday to get my sis in law and her children. Since then we have trying to adjust liveing with two small children. yeah so life is back to be comppletely crazy with no end in sight as we have no timeline on to when things will settle. Ah life.

Kenzi

Mackenzi was born yesterday. 7lbs 9oz 20 inches long, she is beatiful but no pictures yet as the two I do have are on my phone and I cannot get them onto a computer. All Zander wants to do is hit her, not to be mean but to say hi. As soon as I have access to pictures from a camera I will post some.

Oh and I think I am going to start my addictions series back up it died like many things I start often do and when seeing how I posted Zanders birth I found some of those posts too and decided that might be a nice way to write on here more, so probably tomorrow there will be another post up as my addictions have not gone away.

I'm going to DC

SO I am heading to DC in March, about two weeks after my niece is born, but since we just found out that my brother is being deployed in June for six months she will continue to be in Arkansas until he returns from his deployment, giving me many opportunities to visit my niece/have my niece visit me.

Why am I going to DC, well for Reason Rally. I am so excited to go. I was not sure if I would be. I was going to take my little brother but my parents don't want him going without one of them and that is just not possible at the moment. But because he is not going I can now afford to fly, one ticket way cheaper than two. It will be a short trip as I have to work the Monday after, but because it is a short week the week before I get to leave Friday which means I don't have to rush and can enjoy my time more.

I am a little nervous about traveling alone, I mean I have been on a plane before and on my own but I was always meeting someone, a friend my brother, my family, this will be my first time having to arrange everything and be responsible for everything in a place I am not familiar with. Now I will only have to take a train and then be able to walk so I am not super worried about transportation once there but it all is still a bit nerve racking. But I am really excited and cannot wait it should be a good time.

Goodbye 2011 Hello 2012

A lot has happened this year. I turned 21, my nephew turned 1, I found out I was going to be an aunt again but with a niece on the way, I came to the realization that my beliefs had change(recently which is why no post on it yet later on this will come later in the post), we got a new dog(a great Dane named Deo, we got Rose last year she is a Australian Shepard lab mix, Callie is not happy but has gotten used to them a bit), got to see family I hadn't seen in a while, got frustrated with school, had a break through on my writer block, and oh so much more that I can't think of because it's nearly 1am. I am also looking forward to the new year. I already have some things planed, lots of travel(well at least that is in the near future), graduation from University(I know I may have to change the name of my blog), and a lot of unknown.

So as for the past year I feel like I have had a lot of ups which makes for a good year. I may not be where I want to be in my personal life but hey you really can't force that now can you, however as for school and work and my novel I am in a good place, yes I need to make more time to write but the last few months away from it to relax has been helpful,no writers block just needed to think and get the story straight.

Now the change in beliefs. I don't talk about it much as unless you are going out to talk about beliefs and what not I've been taught not to really talk about mine but this is my blog so I am going to and probably will be doing so more in the future. So I discovered I was closer to atheist then theist which in all honesty I've felt that for a while not knowing if there was a god and well through research and exploration I feel there is not, however I do have thoughts about it if there by some chance there happens to be one or many. Again more to come in the future on this. That being said I am closer to being agnostic atheist then just atheist but my views are still developing so who knows where they will go. Already I know i will be attending the Reason Rally in DC this March 24th, my younger brother and I will be hopefully taking a bus to DC to attended the event and we are both really excited(I say hopefully because it is not for sure that the bus will be going until in March, enough people have to sign up for seats for it to leave from Austin).

My niece should be born sometime in the week prior to the Reason Rally and going to the Rally will most likely delay when I get to see her which is okay I didn't meet Zander until a few weeks after his birth as he was in Dover and I could only take the week of Thanksgiving off at the time and I am trying to take as little time off as possible as work may be changing as well but it is too soon to talk about in more detail yet, But I will see Kenzi shortly after her birth since she will be in Arkansas which is just a short 7 to 9 hour drive from Austin, no big deal.

All in all I am looking ahead to the new year and will do my best to write more as well as many other things I plan to make more time for.

Post xmas

Well first off today is my dad's birthday. So Happy Birthday to him. We had a good xmas nice quite simple. My sister-in-law is going to Arkansas to have Kenzi, but I believe it haas more to do with my brother getting crap at work then the need for her to learn to drive though she will be stuck in Arkansas for at least two month after Kenzi is born so she can be properly vacinated before going back to Dover. This makes it easier for me and my family in Texas to see her as the drive to Arkansas is cheaper than tickets to Dover. And I believe that is all right now.

Update and some thoughts

So it has been a while since I did a decent post. Halloween was uneventful a normal day at work and then a quite night in, my family got back late from bringing my brother, sister-in-law, and nephew to Arkansas. We went back there the following weekend for my nephew's first birthday. It was a good time and it was fun to see how happy he was with the cake, thought he is allergic it would seem to the food coloring. I do have picture but they are still on my camera haven't had a chance to get them onto a computer yet. Some things went down that weren't so great but they are still up in the air so I can't really talk about them yet. My sister-in-law is pregnant again it's a girl Mackenzi Renee. She is due in March on my little brother due date actually, though Wesley got evicted (mom was educed so she did not give birth in the car on the way to the hospital, older brother born in about an hour fifteen minutes of active labor I was forty five minutes they were scared it would reduce again an it did mom had only about thirty minutes of active labor with the little brother). Though since Zander was born via c-section Kenzi(or Zi(pronounced z)) has to as well as it has not been enough time for my sis in law to try naturally. But we are all excited if not a little shocked, Kenzi and Zander will only be 16 months apart.

My grandfather who has been in bad health recently is doing worse we don't know how much longer he has but it is probably not very long. I don't know how I feel about this as I have never had a good relationship with him. He tried to beat me when I was only five because I tried to kick my seven year old cousin who was living with us at the time out of the house my grandparents were visiting and were in their RV out in the yard which is where my cousin went, I had to barricade a door until my parents got home and yelled at my grandfather because in their mind it did not matter what I did they would not beat me or let him beat me. I have no other strong memories of him and from what I have been told of my mother's childhood she(well not so much she, she was practically invisible to her parents no matter what she did) and her sibling were beaten regularly in today's society they would have been removed from their home. So it hard to feel sad for a man that was so terrible add to that that he was an alcoholic, a functioning one but still and knowing that part of that fueled my mother's(well when she did get them) , aunts, and uncle's( two aunts one uncle that died before I was born but that is a story for a different post) beating makes it harder. I know my grandmother will be sad an my mom and that makes it hard but I don't know how I will truly feel and that is hard.

There is something I want to write about but can't yet as it has not been dealt with yet I will be dealing with it soon and then probably feel compelled to write about it.

My computer is still dead and while I've gotten my novel back it is hard to write when I know I have to save it in multiple places. I really need a new computer but there is just so much other stuff going on right now that it hard to think about shelling out the money needed to get a decent laptop that will last a good few years, well hopefully more than a few years.

Well that is it fir now I guess hopefully I will be writing more on here at least.